Sacred Solitude

There are days I wish that I had never heard of love.
There are dreams I wish I’d never ventured to dream of.
There are wishes that have not, nor will, nor can come true.
There are nights I know that I won’t sleep, if not with you..
All these aches that life has thrown my way for all these years,
They have shown me more than solitude and bitter tears.
What they’ve taught me, happy days could never teach nor show.
I appreciate the sun because I’ve felt the snow.
I won’t walk about with smiles, nor with my head held high
I will humbly thank the Lord for winters in my life.
I hope the sun shines oft’ enough to thaw my numbing heart,
So one day I can give the warmth I’ve long yearned to impart.
I think that I know how to love and live because of pain.
I think that all these hurting nights are not at all in vain.
I think our God knows what we need to grow and love and give.
Someday I’ll give this warmth to you, for this is why I live.

~~~
I find myself wondering, "What do I have to give? What makes me equipt to love and share? Why me? Me of all people? I fall. I fail. I learn, but it's such a painful process with me! Isn't there someone who would be better suited to build Your kingdom? Someone without all these flaws and needs and weaknesses? ...I am broken and imperfect." Then He speaks softly and clearly to my deepest soul and says, "Exactly."

I am learning that the potential of God's power is most appreciated and ultimately revealed in my moments of weakness.
~~~